Satirical political blogging in Liverpool is reborn, and in a smaller package. Unlike the previous canine correspondents, Hammy can get into those hidden corners of the corridors of power. Eeking out the hot gossip you won't see elsewhere. This is a satirical blog, and if you are incapable of understanding that please navigate away now!!! All entries are made in a strictly personal capacity
UNDER NEW MANAGEMENT
Thursday, December 31, 2009
Scaremongering time again
Year after year Labour councillors pretend to be planning to write a budget, just to get their greasy paws on budget options from officers.
Officer proposals that is, not Lib Dem proposals, and in most cases these are options Lib Dem Councillors have already rejected.
They are given to Labour anyway in case Labour wish to include them in the Labour budget - not that they have written a proper budget this century.
So isn't it astonishing how year after year these confidential documents slip out of the paws of Labour councillors and under a journalist's pint glass.
And yes, of course they somehow get presented as being Lib Dem budget options.
It's amazing what tales you can get published these days.
Fortunatly no one outside of Old Hall Street belives a word Labour have to say anymore.
The Post & Echo were once such respected organs, yet it's heart was ripped out when Trinity turned it into the "Oldham Echo", and clearly it's liver is in a perilous state too!
Time for a new year detox perhaps?
Wednesday, December 30, 2009
Banned!!!!
Your humble blogging canine has been banned from all Liverpool City Council premises, at the demand of Labour Councillors who are aparently so fearful of a little dog's daily musings, that they have decided I must be silenced at all cost.
In the words of one of my regular correspondants, "they clearly don't like it up 'em!"
So much so that I was threatened with assasination, on Christmas day no less.
Ever since I have been sniffing my sausages very carefuly before consuming them.
Fortunatly I can rely on the security of my official supplier at Mr Churchill's food emporium, but you never know who might come into contact with them after they leave the shop.
Is there an investigative journalist who can take up my cause against these evil Labour dog haters?
Or perhaps someone would care to make a freedom of information request to expose the identity of the Labour Councillor who fears me so much that library users and council employees must be banned from hearing the jucy stories I sniff out on your behalf.
Like Jane Kennedy, I now feel I should be able to claim life insurance on my expenses. And how about an official food taster?
Monday, December 28, 2009
In the best possible taste
I did have some left over sausage and bacon rolls to offer you as well, unfortunately I ate them a few hours ago in a late night attack of the munchies!
Today's characters on offer do have political connections though. One a born and bred Scouser who appeared at the Tory Party Conference announcing a plan to bomb Russia
The other now adopted to the city, but sent in by Blair to be Labour's Bishop in Liverpool. Fortunately he seems to have become disillusioned with new Labour, like the rest of the population.
Saturday, December 26, 2009
Scumbags
I have received reports today that the dogs trust in Whiston has been raided by thieves who have stolen all the food stores for 100 of my homeless and hungry compatriots.
An urgent appeal has gone out for tinned food donations, and I myself have just donated a large part of my food stockpile.
If any of you can help, please do so!
Friday, December 25, 2009
Waggy Christmas
I'm so happy today. I was up bright and early to check out my stocking, and boy was it well stocked.
Doggy chocs, a new blanket and the lovely little coat I am pictured wearing in the picture above.
And the best is yet to come, Christmas dinner with all the trimmings, er well, to be honest there is only one trimming I am really interested in.
Yes you guessed it, lots and lots of lovely chipolata sausages wrapped in bacon. Yum Yum!
And so, it is time for my Christmas message to you all.
It's been a long hard year, and many of my readers have been hit hard by our Government's recession and credit crunch.
Our thoughts are with those who find themselves out of work or even homeless in these difficult times. And also with our armed forces who find themselves spending Christmas day overseas.
Our thoughts are also with the many of my fellow canines who find themselves unloved and in kennels and re-homing centres across the country, and our grateful thanks offered to those kind humans who give up their Christmas to look after them.
It has been my great duty and privilege as your blogging dog to record the many events that have affected the lives of our local representatives. All of whom I know make great sacrifices to stand up for the interests of their constituents.
Christmas is not a time for party politics. So today I wish you all, whether you are friend or foe, a very merry Christmas.
Gawd bless you, every one!
Thursday, December 24, 2009
Mean spirtied II
A lovely un-seasonal postcard, with a big picture of Kensington's three clowns grinning.
Now that's what you really want staring down at you on Christmas day, as you digest your Brussels Sprouts.
At the same time Lou-Bo is delivering a rather poor 8 page "report" on her activities. Unfortunately she chose to include the original version of this picture, just to remind everyone of Jane's First Class Gravy Train lifestyle.
Merry Christmas everybody!
Wednesday, December 23, 2009
Mean spirtied
And what a lively card it is, penguins and lambananas playing together in the snow.
Local councillors have scrimped and saved to pay for it to be printed, before trundling off into the cold to deliver them.
Finally I have been able to see a copy of Jane Kennedy's Christmas Card, OK nice picture drawn by a local school child, and a big advert inside to say that it was paid for by mail order shopping company, Shop Direct!
How tight fisted and mean spirited can you get? Is there anything this woman pays for herself?
Is this because she blew all of her "communications expenses" on leaflets before she decided she couldn't win?
And what message does this send out? Your local Labour MP want's you to buy your Christmas gifts by mail order instead of supporting local shops.
Bah Humbug!
Tuesday, December 22, 2009
Popular local boy cheated
Proud working class Scouser, Steve Rotherham's bid was snubbed by Labour's decision to impose an all Luciana shortlist on Liverpool Wavertree.
Putting on a brave face, Cllr Rotheram said: “I’m disappointed...we need more women...But we also need more Scousers and working-class people.”
Click Liverpool reported Labour insiders as saying that, "beautiful, career politician" Luciana Berger was starting to look like a shew-in.
A Lib Dem campaign insider tells me that this shortlist was their dream result.
"Steve was always going to be the toughest challenger. He's the only popular well know name Labour have, and a genuinely nice bloke. Whoever they pick now could have as little as 7 weeks to get their name known before polling day."
Rumour has it, Steve has instead now set his sights on challenging Joe Anderson for the leadership after the local election in May.
Monday, December 21, 2009
Anne Baldock
Friday, December 18, 2009
Really stretching it
That's a hell of a lot of elastic bands! Over 30lbs in old money.
32 boxes at 454 grammes each equals more bands than any office could considerably use day to day. Unless of course they where being used to bundle up Labour party leaflets and letters, rather than legitimate constituency work.
£90.24 and yes, you guessed it! They were all charged to you and me on Gravy-Train Jane's expenses, as you can see here.
To claim they are all being used in her office is seriously stretching it - no pun intended.
Thursday, December 17, 2009
Wavertree selection advertised
Wednesday, December 16, 2009
Unfair banking charges!
Not so for Jane Kennedy, ex Financial Secretary to the Treasury, whose own financial management was so poor that she apparently exceeded her overdraft limit.
Shamelessly, she then tried to claim her interest and banking charges on her expenses - Not just once, but in August, September, November and December last year.
And when they were refused, she sent back terse notes on the claim form, telling the fees office that they should pay up because it was their fault she was overdrawn, as they had been late paying her previous month's expenses.
Is there any limit to the greed and brazen arrogance of Labour MPs?
And is it any wonder the nation's finances are such a mess, when they were being managed by someone who couldn't keep her own finances in the black while earning four times the average wage of her constituents?
But Scousers are nothing if not generous, I'm sure if she had let us all know that things were that tight for her, we would have had a whip round.
Tuesday, December 15, 2009
YOUR money for HER life
High on the list seems to be Wavertree's Jane Kennedy, who already announced she was standing down because of the fall out from the expenses scandal.
In June the Fees Office sent her this letter telling her that they could no longer pay for her life insurance cover with Barclays, at £7.50 a month.
But can someone tell me why the taxpayer was ever footing the bill for this? It was hardly a second home expense. Did she give this to herself as part of her employment incentive package?
Perhaps she regarded it as danger money, after she found herself without the 24 hour protection from Special Branch when she ceased to be a Northern Island Minister?
Stand and deliver!
Monday, December 14, 2009
Billy Clein
Friday, December 11, 2009
Behind the times
Not surprisingly, I don't check the irrelevant Liverpool Censervative website very frequently, and clearly nether do they.
Any Conservative voter wanting to know how their campaign in Liverpool is going, can check their site here, and you will be pleased to know that "The City of Liverpool Conservatives' campaign for the May 2008 Local Elections is now in full swing with a programme of canvassing and leafleting well underway."
So how does that work then?
Ding Dong! "Good evening madam, I was your conservative candidate in last year's local elections. I was wondering if I could have been able to count on your support? Oh, OK you're still thinking about it. Well don't forget, the polling station closed at 10pm, 588 days ago."
Give them another five years and they will be looking forward to increasing their share of the vote in the 2010 General Election.
Thursday, December 10, 2009
We've all been BANNED
Meanwhile, I conducted one of my regular checks on local MP's websites, only to find that Garston's Maria Eagle appears to have banned the entire city from accessing her site.
I assumed it was a temporary problem, but having tried every day for over a week all I can get are imposing FORBIDDEN messages and news that I "don't have permission to access this site."
You would think that this close to a General Election an MP wouldn't be so shy about promoting herself.
Unless of course she is about to announce she is standing down to spend more time in her lavish new £7,140 bathroom, part funded by the taxpayer before she flipped her second home allowance back to her London flat?
Talk about "splashing out" at our expense.
So far she has been allowed to get away with it, remaining, ironically a Justice Minister!!!
Wednesday, December 9, 2009
Party Season
I enjoy a good office Christmas party, think of all those cocktail sausages and sausage rolls.
However those nice Liberal Democrats have taken the time to help organise a Christmas party for pensioners, and Wavertree's next member of parliament is dropping in to lend a hand as he does the usual MP's round of community fun days, village fetes and sheltered housing visits.
Yet one cheeky group of pensioners in Kensington recently invited Colin along to their party, but asked he could attend as their male stripper!
He agreed to attend, but (un)fortunately a sense of decorum prevented him agreeing to provide them with their raunchy entertainment. So Colin won't be doing the dance of the seven towels any time soon.
Tuesday, December 8, 2009
Another Labour selection row
Helen Holt has pulled out out of the contest for the Sherwood constituency in Nottinghamshire , claiming that the selection process has been skewed in favour of the fiancée of a close aide Brown.
Telling The Times that she believes she has been the victim of dirty tricks by supporters of Emilie Oldknow, girlfriend to Brown’s political secretary.
“I feel I have been totally stitched up. My face does not fit. I believe I am being used in a process that from the outside looks fair but is a way of parachuting a candidate into the position because she has family links to Gordon Brown,” she said.
Of course, it couldn't happen here.
The very idea that a Labour selection process in Liverpool could be rigged to favour a young woman because she has links with a Labour leader is, well, completely unthinkable.
Monday, December 7, 2009
Roy Rosie Brown
Friday, December 4, 2009
Feline lookalike
Thursday, December 3, 2009
Most stupid statement ever
Wednesday, December 2, 2009
Under cover campaigner
One ambitious little bird, deeply rooted in the south, was spotted hundreds of miles from home in Wavertree last weekend.
The frequently spotted Berger was seen dashing about the constituency in a rushed attempt to raise her profile before she lands in front of a selection panel in January.
All of this is very hush hush of course. There has been no mention of this in her blog or any of the leaflets going out with her name on in London.
It wouldn't do to alert the voters of her safe ward in Camden that she wants to abandon them, before they have even had a chance to vote for her. People might actually question her loyalty and commitment.
They might feel hurt, they might feel betrayed, they might not care. But it seems that the highly ambitious Luciana is quite prepared to land an enormous bird dropping on her colleagues in St Pancras & Somers Town Ward, and the residents she claims to be committed to fighting for.
Perhaps therein lies a warning for her new colleagues in Liverpool and her prospective electorate oop north.
Tuesday, December 1, 2009
The clock is ticking
OK so Gordon has until June to hold an election, but with increasing rumours of an election being called in March they could be said to be cutting it a bit fine.
Of course, conspiracy theorists within Labour are starting to suspect another motive. The closer the selection process is left before the election, the easier it is to impose a candidate from London on the local party.
That's democracy - Labour style.